On the Lapsed 30

Do we think that he laments with his whole heart and entreats the Lord with fastings, weeping, and mournings who from the first day of his crime frequents the baths daily; who, fed on lavish banquets and swollen with too rich a diet, belches out his indigestion the next day, and does not share his food and drink with the need of the poor? How does one who goes about merry and cheerful weep over his own death? And, though it is written, “You shall not mar the appearance of your beard,” he plucks his beard and dresses up his face. Is he now eager to please anyone, who displeases God? Or does she groan and lament who has time to put on the adornment of costly clothing, and does not think of the garment of Christ which she has lost; to receive costly ornaments and elaborate necklaces, and does not weep for the loss of divine and heavenly adornment? Though you put on foreign garments and silken robes, you are naked; though you adorn yourself with gold and pearls and gems, without the adornment of Christ you are ugly. And you who dye your hair, stop now at least in your sorrows; and you who paint the outline of your eyes with a line of black powder, now at least wash your eyes with tears. If you had lost someone dear to you by death, you would groan sorrowfully and weep; with face unkempt, clothes changed, hair neglected, countenance clouded, looks downcast, you would show the signs of grief. You have lost your own soul, wretched woman; spiritually dead, you have begun to survive yourself here, and, walking about, to carry your own funeral; and do you not lament bitterly, do you not groan continually, do you not hide yourself for shame of your crime or in constant lamentation? See, these are still worse wounds of sinning; see, these are greater offenses: to have sinned and not make satisfaction, to have offended and not weep for the offenses.